How to Write a Dope Book

Just follow these 10 agonizing steps. (Hint: Fall in love. No, not like that.)

Evan Marquart, a student in Schertz, Texas, wanted to know, “How’d you write such a dope book?” Evan, I can’t have you flattering me enough. So here’s an answer, in 10 agonizing steps. Even if you don’t write a book, you might see how you—and others—can take your writing seriously.

1. Read, then write.

Duh. If you haven’t read lots of books, you probably shouldn’t think of writing one just yet. As for writing, do it every single day. Think, brain muscle. Or just think you have to practice. Every single day. 

2. Fall in love.

With me, it was John Quincy Adams. Get crazy about a topic you’re willing to spend years with. 

3. Keep notes in a really good database.

I’m currently using DEVONTHINK 3. For Thank You for Arguing, I took enough notes to fill at least several books.

4. Outline the book by chapters, then outline each chapter.

Then write summaries for each chapter. (I often use the Outline View on Microsoft Word.) Then re-outline and re-organize everything a bunch of times, telling yourself what a loser you are.

5. Write the book, seven or eight times.

Thank You for Arguing was originally around 90,000 words. That’s about 360 double-spaced pages. 

6. Get edited.

My editor at Penguin Random House was as tough as they come. Which I needed.

7. Read it aloud to people.

Teenagers make a much better audience than teachers, because teachers tend to be too supportive. Mark the places where your audience looks bored, then make those sections better.

8. Read the book a bunch more times and make corrections.

By the time the book prints, you’ll have read it at least 30 times. And after it prints, readers will point out more mistakes. Now, if you plan to have the book go into print, as in paper…

9. Write a proposal.

40-60 pages long, with the outline, sample chapter, marketing plan, and other stuff. Even if you plan to self-publish, the proposal is—well, a plan.

10. Find an agent.

That’s assuming you want to have a company publish the book and pay you for it. It’s not so easy, but your proposal can help you attract an agent.

Is it worth it? For me it is. I find writing a book to be the best kind of education. And sometimes it’s even fun.